This Simile Was Like A Squib...

A round-up of 4th of July accidents from around the country includes this disaster:

OCRACOKE, N.C. (AP) - Five people working on Independence Day fireworks shows were killed by explosions, four of them by a single blast that rocked this remote village on the Outer Banks.
...

The blast at Ocracoke came as workers were unloading fireworks Saturday from a truck at the Anchorage Marina, shaking homes and businesses across the southern end of Ocracoke Island and rattling residents and tourists.

Earl Woodham, a spokesman for the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives, said agents determined the cause was accidental. ATF will not investigate further, but a workplace safety agency such as the state Labor Department likely will try to find the specific cause, he said.

Dock master Robert Raborn was about 200 yards away from the truck and said the explosion was one of the loudest things he had ever heard.

"It was like 40 minutes worth of fireworks going off in four seconds," Raborn said.

I'll bet it sounded exactly like forty minutes worth of fireworks going off in four seconds.  Fortunately, one person is in fair condition.

Comments

[Jack is Back!]

A lot of fireworks over Palin resigning but at least no one has died yet. Maybe we should have ATF investigate that and see what the real cause was!

[joycekane]

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[Dave]

The spam was like spam.

[Old Lurker]

JOM fashion police need to go see the flowered dress on the First Lady posted on Drudge. Now that will teach those Ruskies about good taste, yes indeedy.

[Dave]

Cue up the Sir Mix-A-Lot, comrades!

[Porchlight]

Please tell me she's not wearing a belt over the cardigan again. Is that a clear plastic belt? Even worse.

I googled a little for more photos but I couldn't stand reading the links so I gave up.

[DebinNC]

Michelle pic at Drudge. She's looked much worse. The galling thing is constantly being told she's a fashion goddess, when she obviously isn't.

[Porchlight]

She has certainly looked worse, Deb. I like the retro cardigan/dress/pearls look. Just was wondering if that really is a clear belt over the cardigan as it appears to be - hard to tell in the Drudge pic.

[Old Lurker]

Are hoops back in fashion?

Just wondering.

[Rick Ballard]

I believe that the Crowning of ClaraBelle fits in rather nicely with the ongoing exposure of Ogabe's lack of intelligence. It's of a part with their possession of Credentials of Indoctrination from schools which, at one time, possessed a decent reputation.

I'll stick with "stunning" as an appropriate adjective regarding anything to do with the Trash Emperor and his well matched mate.

[Extraneus]

Let me just say that Ocracoke Island is a fantastic place. To get there by car, you have to take not one but two little ferries. Great, great place. Miles of beautiful empty beaches in May. Just pull your car over and jump right in. Wild horses, really expensive real-estate. Great place.

[Extraneus]

Are hoops back in fashion?

Whatever she wears is back in fashion, OL. Even the maternity dresses.

[Dave]

Ø probably likes the profile photos because they don't reveal the jug handles.

The Missus is perhaps less fond of them.

Sorry for being so catty, but at least I'm not following the 8 years' precedent of the other side comparing the Chief Executive to Pan troglodytes.

(Who am I kidding? I'm not sorry)

[Frau Modepolizei]

Old Lurker, Mrs. McGregor does not *need* hoops in her skirts.

[jean]

Oh my its my mother.except my mother was white and 5'1",but a swear my mother wore that dress in the 50's. Mom didn't do the plastic belt thing

[We'll huff and we'll puff and we'll blow that shirt off.]

Until we invented the tetanun vaccine there was a small epidemin of lockjaw deaths every year after Independence Day from people driving dirt into their flesh with fireworks.

[Dave]

Now we have other fireworks-related health issues.

[caro]

I'm swooning over the totally metrosexual lavender file folders the Ibama is carrying.

[Jane]

lavender file folders

That's his salute to the gays Caro - before he screws them.

[Dave (in MA)]

"Computer,

Zoom and Enhance image".

[Lord Whorfin]

PLEASE! Tell me that her butt is not that big!!

[Porchlight]

I'm swooning over the totally metrosexual lavender file folders the Ibama is carrying.

They match half his neckties, too. The other 50% are powder(puff) blue.

[JM Hanes]

caro:

Kudos for giving Barack his due while the rest of us are distracted by the glare glancing off FLOTUS. From the look on POTUS' face, I'd say Michelle made him carry the purple prose -- along with her flowered satchel and some unidentifiable white objet on his sinister side. So much for Looking Presidential!

The JMH Brand of fashion snarkisme would not be complete, of course, without noting the emblematic incongruity of tieless shirt with buttoned jacket...

But I digress. For those who missed last night's late night show and tell, I have to say the image below has assumed new meaning:

Apparently, this outfit was actually a carefully considered choice, not an impromptu display of casual insouciance -- why else would Michelle pack, not one, but two yellow sweaters?

Dave:

Loved your P'shopped Hillary in the Sad Eyed thread!

[Dave (in MA)]

JM Hanes, the " flowered satchel and some unidentifiable white objet on his sinister side" is actually one of the kids, and WE don't make fun of politician's kids.

[jean]

I've been saying this since Jan.The woman needs to buy a size bigger slacks

[Porchlight]

It is, Dave - probably Malia, judging from her height. I had to look closely to figure it out, though.

[JM Hanes]

Ah! Dave's enhancement proves me wrong! It's a lady dressed up like a satchel. So who is she, and why does the President have his arm around her? Has a First Daughter grown more in office than her father?

[JM Hanes]

I am, like, seriously lagging behind here. Perhaps a turn in the garden will clear my head.

[Dave (in MA)]

JM Hanes, here's your answer.

[JM Hanes]

Lord W (and the misguided hoopsters): It's a bustle silly!

Yes, I am actually leaving now...

[Sue]

Porch,

It's a clear belt with exchangeable buckles, it would http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/wire/sns-ap-eu-russia-first-ladies,1,4024648.story>appear.

[Sara (Pal2Pal)]

If you saw the live shot of her from AF1, you would think her butt is a mile wide.

[Sue]

http://www.luxurydivas.com/StoreFrontProfiles/DeluxeSFItemDetail.aspx?sid=1&sfid=15500&c=863396&i=245264926>Here you go if you want the Michelle look.

[Sara (Pal2Pal)]

Changing the subject.

First, the most vile man in America has finally died and I cannot help feeling a moment of celebration. May he be haunted thru all eternity by the souls of those whose blood is on his own. Robert Strange McNamara dead at 93.

Second, have you all see Andy McCarthy this morning. A Barack Obama article from Columbia 1983 has surfaced.

[jean]

Ok did anyone see the Photo of Obama and Michell coming off Marine1.Swear it looks like two men.When Venus and Serena are invited to the White House that will be a picture to behold.The NFL will be so jealous

[Sue]

Actually, there are times when I think Michelle is attractive. Not beautiful, but certainly attractive. She does not flatter herself with the slicked back hairdo. And the belts and maternity outfits (unless she is actually pregnant) need to go. But some of her pictures, when her hair is softer and her smile genuine, she passes for pretty.

[Sue]

JMH,

http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/slideshow/photo//090706/ids_photos_ts/r2031252154.jpg/#photoViewer=/090706/ids_photos_ts/r1427532556.jpg>You can see the older daughter's outfit better in this picture. Her mother has her dressed like her. Without the belt.

[Jane]

WEll I last dressed for the nines in 1975 but I think her fashion sense is absolutely atrocious. I'll have to trust Sue on this one tho.

[clarice]

McNamara really was an waful person, Sara.

[Porchlight]

Goodness, that belt. (I don't want to play the "what if Sarah Palin had worn it?" game, but you get the drift.)

Otherwise I think that pink outfit is not so bad, Sue.

[Porchlight]

Otherwise I think that pink outfit is not so bad, Sue.

...which is not to say that you had opined otherwise, just responding to you since you linked the pic...

[Sue]

Porch,

I was linking to show she is using the interchangeable belt buckle on a belt that cost $9.99, apparently. You know, her senseable but stylish, yada, yada...

In the picture on drudge, it has a purple(???? why purple) buckle, in the one I linked, it matches her dress. In another I found, it is red.

[Sue]

I don't think Sarah Palin needs a belt to define her waistline. Which is part of the bitterness on display. She really does have a killer body.

[Sue]

Or sensible, if you prefer. ::sigh::

[Porchlight]

Thanks, Sue - I found a closeup of the blue rose dress so I could see the purple buckle, and I had the same reaction - why purple? I have to say I do love blue roses, though - so perfectly 50s.

[Dave (in MA)]

What if the whole outfit was made from the same material as the belt (think Joanna Cassidy in Bladerunner)?

[Dave (in MA)]

Ok did anyone see the Photo of Obama and Michell coming off Marine1.Swear it looks like two men.When Venus and Serena are invited to the White House that will be a picture to behold.The NFL will be so jealous

Posted by: jean

Is that you, Imus?

[JM Hanes]

Dave:

Well, at least somebody is likely to grow in office! I have to say though, the First Kids strike me as adorable, well-adjusted, remarkably well behaved, and the family dynamics that come across in almost every photo seem terrific. The Obamas look like great parents to me.

Sue:

Rainbow of interchangeable buckles, or Imelda Marcos of Argyle and Waist Ware? Those little white snaps suggest the former (as well as the Dollar Store), but then, she did mix two yellow sweaters into her rainbow of knits.

Porchlight:

It's the I-Just-Throw-These-Fabulous-Outfits together thing. Or the Little-Bit-of-Daring-Mismatch pour encourager les otres outres.

I am so not here. Nope, not here at all.

[Jane]

Jean,

I sent you an email.

[JM Hanes]

"Striking" is the term usually attached to tall, good looking women.

[jean]

Dave no not Imus,just in a really grumpy mood,and tired of hearing how lovely and what a lady Michelle is Jane thanks

[Sue]

Whoa! http://www.chocolatefashionblog.com/2009/06/michelles-belt-in-clear.html>The Chocolate Fashion Blog says the belt is a Sonia Rykiel and costs $220. So much for my sensible $9.99 version.

[Jack is Back!]

Anyone who has ever traveled Europe and specifically Eastern Europe extensively since the wall came down will rate Polish and Russian women as the most attractive and fashion conscience. For the American media to think and then publicize some kind of awakening among the proletariat babushkas as a result of Michelle Obama's fashion sense is a bit much and shows how ignorant and marginalized they are. Even Sarah Palin has a much more pragmatic and sensitive world view then the people who write such crap. In fact, Michelle will get more than she gives on this trip. I just hope she has a tolerance for "Jewel of Russia" vodka which is what they will drink copiously.

[daddy]

"THIS SIMILE IS LIKE A SQUIB"

Hey, I think I figured it out.

A simile : a figure of speech comparing two unlike things that is often introduced by like or as (as in cheeks like roses) — compare metaphor

A squib 1 a: a short humorous or satiric writing or speech b: a short news item ; especially : filler
2 a: a small firecracker b: a broken firecracker in which the powder burns with a fizz
3: a small electric or pyrotechnic device used to ignite a charge

Conclusion: TM's been drinking his coffee this AM! No evidence of Alzheimer's by our firecracker of a Host.

[jean]

Sue you didn't really think Michelle would wear a 10 dollar belt?That is for slubs like us.This is the woman that has 550 dollar tennis shoes

[Sue]

Jean,

LOL. No, but I didn't realize it was a designer belt. Figured it came from J Crew. I can't determine if she has 3 clear belts or 1 belt with 3 buckles. Google isn't my friend on this one.

[Sue]

I hope she sticks with just the belt. I have seen some of Rykiel's clothing designs in my search for the perfect clear belt and I don't think the big O can pull them off.

[daddy]

Jack is Back,

I think after 4 or 5 belts of Jewel Of Russia vodka Michelle would look striking to me in her $220 belt.

[daddy]

Jean,

"I can't determine if she has 3 clear belts or 1 belt with 3 buckles."

You mean sort'a like the 3 stars in Orion's Belt? Excuse me, Oreeeon's Belt, is I think how Obama pronounces it. Hey, maybe he wasn't talking astronomy. Maybe Oreeeon is O's nickname for Michelle's midsection.

[Danube of Thought]

I've always thought that one of the finest compliments men could bestow upon a woman was that she had an ass like two volleyballs.

When we're talking two medicine balls, I'm not sure we're still in compliment territory.

[DebinNC]

Michelle and Condi for the "your lying eyes" file.

[Old Lurker]

Gotta tell you that when Mrs. Lurker hears me chuckling while reading JOM, her standing question is "well what are you and your computer friends talking about THIS time?" to which I respond by reading her some JOMer's particularly brilliant economic observation, or another's particularly insightful political idea, or any one of our legal eagles' constitutional concerns, or anything Clarice writes about our friends who live in her neighborhood, or anything written by Kim under any name about environmental silliness...and she always leaves me alone since she sees I am having important discourse of national import with smart people.

She is never to know about the JOM fashion column, or see any of the photographs posted relating thereto! And certainly not that I was first to snicker about the Drudge photo. Please!

[daddy]

No sweat OL,

We'll keep it under our belt.

[Old Lurker]

Not much help, Dad, if it's that ugly clear thingy.

[Dave (in MA)]

"Orion" is the correct pronunciation in the lower 57, uh 58.

Not sure how they say it in Ø's (native?) state of Hawaii.

[Caro]

You know that Oprah cover has Photoshopped her slim figure. Is it even MO's body?

[Sue]

Caro,

Really? I'll have to go back and look again.

[Sue]

After looking at it again, they should have spent a minute or two photoshopping Oprah.

[Caro]

Is this something new from J.Crew? I haven't been looking much since 1995.

[peter]

No worries, Old Lurker, our little secret.

[jean]

I'm back from deskunking the dog and in a better mood. I feel badly about saying Michelle could be drafted by the NFL.I'm not sure she is that big.I know she is as big or bigger than a lot of players in the MLB so I'll back off the NFL and just go with the MLB

[Jane]

Not much help, Dad, if it's that ugly clear thingy.

That made me laugh.

I wish TM would start a thread on Honduras. I want to hear what everybody thinks our presidents support of the Hugo Chavez' pawn.

[caro]

Dave in MA
LOL and then some re the TelePromter Users Manual!

[Pofarmer]

I want to hear what everybody thinks our presidents support of the Hugo Chavez' pawn.

It's predictable lefty boilplate. Punish your friends and reward your enemies. It shows how secure you are, or something.

[daddy]

"I'm back from deskunking the dog..."

Jean,

One of the funnest and funniest days of my young life was the night of my brothers Senior Prom in Leavenworth Kansas, way back in about 1970. We lived on base, Dad was a bigshot, and we actually had a trustee from the prison who came and did the tomato plants and the yard and was just a harmless buck private doing his sentence until discharged. We 3 decided it would be a good idea to walk down toward the river, so crossing the railroad tracks, my brother, a snake lover, spotted a big black snake and determined he had to catch it. Surprisingly, it was very unanimated. The strong smell of skunk was nearby, but we never put 2 and 2 together. Anyhow, my big brother caught it, did the usual tough kid stuff; wrapping it around his neck and arms etc, especially as it scared the prisoner who was deathly afraid of snakes.
Then he realized it had been sprayed by a skunk, and thats why everything stunk so bad. Now me and the Prisoner were laughing our buns off, and we all dashed home to see if Mom could figure out how to get rid of skunk spray, 3 hours prior to the Senior Prom. (She couldn't!) Tried soaps, perfumes, ketchep, lemon juice, milk, you name it, but man, did he stink...and now not just like a skunk, but also (what with all Mom's failed remedies), probably like Perez Hilton and his ilk smell like in a San Francisco sauna. Geez---that was fun. I was like Theodore Cleaver, (The Beaver) laughing at Wally in a tough scrape, and mom, (June Cleaver) was scrubbing to the bone, and the prisoner was giggling on his way back for the Evening to the Army Prison
to regale his fellow inmates about the Colonel's dumbass kid, and all the while Mary Lou what's-her-name, (The Head Cheerleader) was sitting at her home primping her outfit in anticipation of her big night, and the moment my brother, who was supposed to drive up in Dad's Volkswagon Bug in a tuxedo in 1 hour and take her to the Prom, knocked on her front door. Classic. Simply classic.

That always springs to mind when I hear about "de-skunking." Apologies for the ramble.

[jean]

Thanks Daddy .I guess I had it really easy since it was just the dog

[narciso]

You know I don't like to be snarky about the real life "Sherry Palmer" but what are her advisors thinking let her go out like
that; or is it really a case of the
"Emperor's New Clothes' The thing is some people has grace and class, no matter what
they wear, and some don't

[clarice]

About that "squib" triple entendre--is TM clever or what?

[daddy]

No squabbling or quibbling with TM's Squib scribbling.

[Porchlight]

Aw, daddy, poor Mary Lou! What happened, did he take her anyway?

[joycekane]

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[Frau Modepolizei]

Can we keep the First Daughters and Bo and retire the First Parental Units (the Bamster & his Mrs.); the country may not survive them if they finish out their tour of booty, er, duty. Sorry, the photos up thread are seared, seared in my memory.

Honduras certainly needs the *correct* reporting of her citizens' defense of their constitution. Dennis Prager had Mary O'Grady, the columnist for the Wall Street Journal, on his radio program today to talk about the situation. Our specialists are not helping. That's the plan, right?

[daddy]

Porchlight, He did!

Mary Lou wound up being a very good sport. She was the Head Cheerleader at the Catholic High School in town (either Imaculata or Sacred Heart-I can't remember the name) and cute as a button and big fun. I was in love with her from way back. She took it in very good humor. Big Brother was the starting Quarterback for the Varsity Football team at rival Leavenworth High School (The Pioneer's). They met during Basketball season when he was Point Guard and she was Rah-Rah'ing for the other guys. A good guy, 30 years on he lives just a few miles this side of where the Ferry now leaves from the mainland at I believe Cedar Point, to go over to Ocrakoke. Legend has it that in the sound behind his inland waterway digs is where BlackBeard got killed, and then his body was shipped to Ocracoke Island where his head was stuck on a pole, just near where TM's linked squib says the squibs blew up on 4th of July.

So, just like a belt, this thread started at Ocracoke, wrapped all the way around Orreeon and Michelle's waist, and after de-skunking a dog or 2, plus 1 fragrant Senior Prom In Leavenworth, we complete the loop and find ourselves back at Ocracoke. Mary Lou I think started an Interracial dating Spam service cite but I can't swear to that. The Trustee Prisoner afraid of snakes I think just got elected to the Senate from Minnesota...Or maybe it's the other way round. Go Pioneers!

[joycekane]

May every Jack has his Jill.
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