Is It The Times, Or The Onion (Ongoing...)

It looks like the Times but delivers like the Onion:

Obama to Reassure Europe at NATO Gathering

How, by resigning?  Brandishing his Nobel?

Body language mavens will marvel at this photo of our reassuring Prez:

Defensive or arrogant?  I deplore these false choices - both!

Comments

[MarkO]

Stupid?

[hit and run]

"I think that [Obama] has never really been challenged intellectually. … So, what I sensed in him was not just a restless spirit but somebody with such extraordinary talents that had to be really taxed in order for him to be happy. … He’s been bored to death his whole life. He’s just too talented to do what ordinary people do."
--stuff Valerie Jarrett said (and Obama believes)

[peter]

Maybe Valerie Jarrett was just being ironic.

[RichatUF]

Miserable Failure.

[Thomas Collins]

Europe and NATO and the proper role for the alliance in Afghanistan? No worries! Unlike a few years ago, when American had a POTUS with low status who wasn't respected in the world, we now have one (i) whom world leaders wouldn't dare leave out of a key meeting on environmental matters, as they left out Boosh, and (ii) whose economic policies would command the immediate assent of all world leaders, unlike Boosh's policies. Wait a minute. That was Obama who was left out of the meeting? That was Obama who recently had his head handed to him on economic matters on his world tour? Never mind . . . .

[RichatUF]

Thomas-

Wait til they slip him the letter that economic conditions are such that they are bailing on the Afghan mission.

[MayBee]

Barack doesn't belong to just us!

[Mohammed]

Barrack is made of the stuff I scrape off of the bottom of my shoes.

[Stephanie]

Is that a "Get me the F outta here look" or what?

[Ann]

Judge halts certification of senate race in Alaska. GO JOE!

[RichatUF]

Stephanie-

NATO couldn't come up with a strategic doctrine, they mouthed platitudes on Afghanistan, and Europeans are cozying up to the Russians. Yep, ole Barack improving the USA's image abroad.

[Ann]

Is that a "Get me the F outta here look" or what?

Two of em!

[Janet]

Barry Soetoro is giving her a headache.

[hit and run]

MayBee:
Barack doesn't belong to just us!

Take my president,please!

My president and I have the secret to making an administration last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food. He goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my president did.

I take my president everywhere, but he keeps finding his way back.

I asked my president, "Where do you want to go for the anniversary or your inaugural?" He said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I told him, "How about an executive conference room?"

Take my president,please!

We always hold hands. If I let go, he spends the taxpayers' money.

My president has a black belt in spending.

My president will sign any bill marked up. Last year he signed an elevator.

All my president does is spend - once he was sick for a week, and three lobbying firms went out of business.

My president and I went back to the site where we spent his inaugural. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.

My president drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled him over and asked, "Where are you going?" My president said, "I must be late, everyone is all coming back! And the he drives into a ditch! I need a Slurpee."

Take my president,please!

[Janet]

What is his real name anyway? Barry Barack Dunham Soetoro Obama? Who the hell is he?

[bgates]

I think that [Obama] has never really been challenged intellectually.

"And then there was this -- the last person I spoke to was a young woman, looked like she was of Chinese heritage; lived in Dallas; 16 years old. When she was a freshman in high school, she studied biology and became interested in life sciences and became interested in cancer research. So she decided during the summer to teach herself chemistry -- (laughter) -- taught herself chemistry, and designed as a science project exploration of the development of a new cancer drug, based on some experimental cancer drugs that are currently being put together that involve injecting the drug and then it’s activated by light. And it allows a more localized treatment that isolates the cancer cells -- kills the cancer cells but leaves the healthy cells untouched.

...
So I’m talking to her, pretending like I understand everything that she’s saying."

Challenge extended! Maybe when his term is up, he can go work as a lab tech for her at UT.

[matt]

"please, would you all stop yelling at me for a moment? I know. I f'ed up. But being President of the World is really, really hard. Soros never told me it would be like this."

[hit and run]

Three weeks ago, my president learned how to drive. Last week he learned how to aim it at the ditch.

My president told me the car wasn't running well, there was mud in the carburetor. I asked where the car was, and he told me it was in the ditch.

I came home, the car was in the ditch. "How did you get the car in there?" "Easy, I took a left at the guard rail."

Take my president,please!

[Janet]

Maybe the Valerie Jarrett quote about Obama just shows how dumb SHE is. If someone pontificates ad nauseum she thinks they are smart and extraordinary.

[Elliott]

Too cool for Seoul.

[Gmax]

Defensive or arrogant?

Well you got to the right answer, both. Perhaps 110% of both too.

[hit and run]

Janet:
Maybe the Valerie Jarrett quote about Obama just shows how dumb SHE is.

Forget Jarrett. In fact,millions of people share her opinion...even today.

Think about the fact that Obama shares her opinion...even today.

[DrJ]

Maybe when his term is up, he can go work as a lab tech for her

Not a chance. A good tech has a pretty well-defined skill set, none of which I've seen in Barack. An ability to add and report truthfully helps a lot, for example.

[DrJ]

Hi Elliott!!

[Janet]

That is so true hit....same with algore, the prick with a wick. :(

Hey America! Pontificate ad nauseum & you too can be smart & extraordinary!

[Clarice]

Did you ever dream you were taking a test and didn't have a clue about the subject? That's what in his heart of hearts he is now living every minute of every day. He pulled off the scam of the century and now is fully exposed as a blithering idiot.
P.S. It looks like he and Hillary are really not getting along very well.

[Clarice]

BTW from his eyes, it appears he's searching for the teleprompter off to the side.

[Janet]

Yeah! hahahaha...he's thinking, "Someone get over here & help me. I don't know what they're talking about."

[maryrose]

His arms are crossed which shows he is not engaged and keeping his distance. Barack always thinks he's too cool for the room.
Janet: I mistrust people with too many names. Pick one and stick with it. You forgot to include Hussein as part of his name. You think he would have atleast changed that but it's part and parcel of his Muslim phase.I love how we couldn't whisper his middle name during the campaign but now all bets are off.

[matt]

They're all speaking Austrian!

[Janet]

How could I forget Hussein?!

[Captain Hate]

Did you ever dream you were taking a test and didn't have a clue about the subject? That's what in his heart of hearts he is now living every minute of every day. He pulled off the scam of the century and now is fully exposed as a blithering idiot.

But he was the best head of "The Office of President Elect" evarrrrrrrrr.

[Captain Hate]

DrJ'a correct; Odoofus would be a worse lab technician than Preznit. Reflect on that for a while. He wouldn't last a day in IT; and I've seen nearly worthless bullshitters get carried for decades.

[Danube of Thought]

I have that dream probably ten times a year. The only worse one is when I dream I have to get up and go to work.

[Pofarmer]

O.K. Folks, need a little assistance.

We are doing a chili cookoff tomorrow, and the theme is "Holiday, the United way." Anyway, we picked Presidents day for our Holiday, and are going as George Washington, Ulysses S Grant, Abe Lincoln, and Sarah Palin. We are trying to think up a snappy campaign like slogan thingy to put on the front of our podium!!!!!

[Granny]

O/T and back to the TSA for a moment--I just got this joke from a friend and it belongs on JOM:

"The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners at the airports.
It's a booth you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you. They see this as a win-win for everyone, with none of this crap about racial profiling. It also would eliminate the costs of a long and expensive trial. Justice would be swift. Case closed!

You're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter an announcement comes over the PA system . . . "Attention standby passengers — we now have a seat available on flight number 1234. Shalom!"

[Jim,MtnViewCA,USA]

He's distracted by someone's cute posterior.
The husband is the cool looking onlooker, he's not amused.

[Rob Crawford]

The only worse one is when I dream I have to get up and go to work.

I hate that one; have it like five times a week.

[Strawman Cometh]

nearly worthless bullshitters get carried for decades.
But I'm stayin' alive, ♪ stayin alive ♫

[Clarice]

"You Have the right to remain silent and eat your chile!"

[Janet]

You might be right Jim...he's known for ogling!

[Janet]

How bout this (from google chili cook off images)

Put an Uncle Sam top hat on the kidney bean & the pepper....or dress them patriotic...or ??

[narciso]

The angle is different, but similar, in the LUN

[Janet]

Or the Uncle Sam poster -

I want YOU to taste this chili

[Janet]

Yeah narciso...his arms are not crossed it that picture. He's open to all possibilities! Ready to engage!

[pagar]

"The only worse one is when I dream I have to get up and go to work."

I've been retired for years and yet I still have nightmares during early Monday mornings that I have to get ready for work.
The rest of the week it never bothers me, only on Mondays.

[Janet]

E PLURIBUS UNUM
Out of many ingredients one great bowl of chili!

[Janet]

George Washington - "I would cross the Delaware to get another bowl of this chili."
Ulysses S Grant - "?????"(can't think of anything for Grant's line)
Abe Lincoln - "Honestly the best chili I've ever eaten."
Sarah Palin - "Do I LOVE this chili? You betcha!"

[Clarice]

Grant: This stuff will run thru you faster than I ran thru Richmond

[Melinda Romanoff]

Clarice-

I was thinking Marx Brothers explosives for Grant, with a Vicksburg twist, but yours works better.

[Thomas Collins]

The caption I think of when I look at the photo TM put at the top of this thread is:

"Who's taking away the arugula from the salad bar and replacing it with unpasteurized cheese?"

[peter]

Today is the anniversary of the Gettysburg Address.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

[hit and run]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_theticket/20101119/ts_yblog_theticket/millionaires-to-obama-tax-us>Joe Biden's kind of patriots*:

More than 40 of the nation's millionaires have joined Patriotic Millionaires for Fiscal Strength to ask President Obama to discontinue the tax breaks established for them during the Bush administration

"For the fiscal health of our nation and the well-being of our fellow citizens, we ask that you allow tax cuts on incomes over $1,000,000 to expire at the end of this year as scheduled," their website states. "We make this request as loyal citizens who now or in the past earned an income of $1,000,000 per year or more."

Wow. More than 40!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/09/number-of-us-millionaires_n_491942.html>Wait. What?

After a 27 percent decline in the number of millionaire households in 2008, the ranks of U.S. millionaires swelled to 7.8 million last year.

41 / 7,8000,000 = 0.0005%

If .00005% of any group speaks with one voice,it's a genuine movement!

But if this is a genuine movement of genuine-intentioned patriots,there is nothing stopping these 41 patriot millionaires from expressing their patriotic patriotism today.

Here,let me help. I'm nothing if not http://www.fms.treas.gov/faq/moretopics_gifts.html>helpful:

Citizens who wish to make a general donation to the U.S. government may send contributions to a specific account called "Gifts to the United States." This account was established in 1843 to accept gifts, such as bequests, from individuals wishing to express their patriotism to the United States. These contributions are considered an unconditional gift to the government. Financial gifts can be made by check or money order payable to the United States Treasury and mailed to the address below.

Gifts to the United States
U.S. Department of the Treasury
Credit Accounting Branch
3700 East-West Highway, Room 622D
Hyattsville, MD 20782

You are patriots of patriotic patriotism,aren't you? Well? Aren't you? I'd like to see a receipt before I take your idea seriously**.

_________________
*Biden thought http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2008/09/18/biden-on-tax-increase-for-wealthier-citizens-time-to-be-patriotic/>$1M too high a threshhold for one's patriotic tax duty to kick in. Unfortunately,Patriotic Quarter-Millionaires for Fiscal Strength just didn't have the same panache.

**Biden would also like a word with you. A http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2008/10/oh-that-joe-n-6.html>four-letter word...taxes. Literally.

[Beans, beans, the magical fruit.]

Ask hot what your chili can do for you, ask for seconds.
=============

[narciso]

If it's November, it's time for the usual outrage after leaking intellectual property, in the LUN

[Thomas Collins]

Peter, how did Abe do that without a teleprompter?

[hit and run]

Posted by: Elliott | November 19, 2010 at 07:11 PM

Wait. What?

I missed Elliott while I was getting a beer from the garage?!!!?!?

That sucks. I'm never drinking again.

At 7:11 PM

[bunkerbuster]

I do love how routinely identity conservatives flaunt the emotional basis of their politics and how, when it comes to Obama, they consider his presidency above a personal affront of some sort. Thus the endless, paranoid scouring of minutia for any sign -- real or imagined -- that the president is provoking wingnuts' perpetually inflamed sense of intellectual inferiority.
That's why there's almost never any discussion of policy on this blog, just a bunch of self-righteous, hypocritical whining...When wingnuts aren't declaring their vast intellectual superiority vis a vis Obama, they're moaning that the president looks down on them. Intellectually, it's a terminal condition...

[Jim Ryan]

Ulysses S Grant - "I'm going to invest all of my net worth in this chili. I can't lose!"

Grant's skills in business were bad, to put it politely. He went broke twice, once before the war and once after his presidency.

[narciso]

I was going to say, Hit, are you ok, you sounded like McCloskey in "Airplane", saying it was a wrong week to quit __________

[macphisto]

the last time i saw that many straw men, i was driving through central Illinois in October.

[Out of what recipe book did this bit of formulaic writing come?]

bb's 9:03 could have been written about anyone instead of Obama and his subjects could have been anything instead of 'identity conservatives' and it would still have been just a contentless, and annoyed.
======================

[scott]

Bam!! "identity conservatives" so early in the weekend too!!

obama's thinking, "f**k, guess I could burn one behind that screen over there."

[narciso]

Spunkmeyer likes to go splat, earlier in the deal, however the Judges line to Billy Madison
covers it well

[It'll make you feel a lot better.]

It's like an incantation, bb. Why don't you just point bones, or something.
========

[macphisto]

US Grant: "You'll Unconditionally Surrender To This Chili!"

[hit and run]

just a bunch of self-righteous, hypocritical whining...

What has 103 words and was posted at 9:03 PM,Alex?

aka

Unintentional Projection of Auto-Biographical Preening (UPABP)

[Danube of Thought]

I do love how routinely identity conservatives..

Still wondering what in God's name an identity conservative is. This poor fellow has this strange metalanguage that no one can understand.

[RichatUF]

hit and run-

Ha. Lets see how generous people have been in their public giving to the US Treasury:

2010 $2,840,466.75
2009 3,063,057.05
2008 2,189,358.89
2007 2,624,862.42
2006 1,646,209.41

A blast from the past: "Unless the Congress acts, most of the tax relief we have delivered over the past 7 years will be taken away. Some in Washington argue that letting tax relief expire is not a tax increase. Try explaining that to 116 million American taxpayers who would see their taxes rise by an average of $1,800. Others have said they would personally be happy to pay higher taxes. I welcome their enthusiasm, and I am pleased to report that the IRS accepts both checks and money orders.

Most Americans think their taxes are high enough. With all the other pressures on their finances, American families should not have to worry about the Federal Government taking a bigger bite out of their paychecks. There is only one way to eliminate this uncertainty: make the tax relief permanent."

[hit and run]

DoT:
Still wondering what in God's name an identity conservative is.

As far as I can tell,anyone who doesn't let Obama "TSA" them.

[Rob Crawford]

Intellectually, it's a terminal condition...

Life is a terminal condition, asshat.

Do you have anything beyond abuse to add? No? Then why do you take our existence as an affront? Why do you care what we talk about?

[hit and run]

narciso:
I was going to say, Hit, are you ok, you sounded like McCloskey in "Airplane", saying it was a wrong week to quit __________

Well. Truth be told,I actually,truly,really,honest-to-goodness,I-am-not-making-this-up quit drinking tonight.

No. I'm serious.

Really.

...

But I shall resume at approximately 10:00am tomorrow.

[Clarice]

OT:More peak oil
http://nextbigfuture.com/2010/11/tyler-formation-could-be-one-third-to.html>Drill, damn it

[gus]

Yes. Obama is oh so talented. Just because Jarrett says so. What are his talents??
And when do we get to see them.

[Pofarmer]

Thanks ya'll!

i've photoshopped ( crudely) the I want you poster, ans am working on the quotes to go around it,

[Thomas Collins]

Well, bunkerbuster, here's your chance to express a policy view. The NY Times article TM linked discusses European, including Polish, support for the missile defense shield Obama is supporting in Europe. Do you think the Obama missile defense plan is better than the Bush plan Obama's plan replaced? Do you think the Polish government prefers Obama's plan, or is it expressing support because it thinks Obama's plan is better than nothing? Another topic at the NATO meeting is going to be Afghanistan. Do you agree with RichatUF's 6:05 PM post that the Euros may bail on us in Afghanistan due to economic conditions? Do you agree with Angela Merkel's view that it is naive to think we can get rid of nukes? Speaking of Angela Merkel, although this wasn't discussed in the NY Times article TM linked, Chancellor Merkel recently expressed strong views against multiculturalism. Do you think her view on multiculturalism is sound?

I recall extensive substantive discussion on this blog of whether Ben Bernanke's most recent round of open market operations will be effective. Do you think that these operations are simply to keep certain big banks afloat, or will they benefit the economy as a whole. How about marginal tax rates? Do you really think raising marginal tax rates hurts the trust fund rich, or is it the mid level business entrepreneurs who are most hurt?

The possibilities for policy discussion on this blog are endless, bunkerbuster. And perhaps I am misreading, but there seems to me to be plenty of policy discussion on this blog. But please add to it if you don't think there is enough.

By the way, do you think a reference to "identity conservatives" constitutes policy discussion, or is it the type of snark that you seem to think is too prevalent on this blog? Is it possible that you should look into your own policy glass house, bunkerbuster, before you throw stones at the folks who post on this blog?

[hit and run]

From Tapper http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2010/11/huh-president-obama-tells-volunteers-that-in-midterms-you-guys-turned-yes-we-can-into-yes-we-did.html>quoting a Team Obama moment to volunteers...

"This was about the volunteer effort, not the election result," said Democratic National Committee spokesman Brad Woodhouse. "The party made 86 million voter contacts, we had staff or volunteers in 435 congressional districts, we raised and spent more money than ever in a midterm, we had the lergest midterm field effort ever, we ran or staffed virtually all the coordinated campaigns in all the key states."

Now...86,000,000 voter contacts. I'm neither confirming nor denying that roughly 3,000 of those were from .... well,some "volunteer" from the JOM comments. I've said too much.

[hit and run]

Pofarmer:
i've photoshopped ( crudely) the I want you poster

I'm here for you...should you need me.

[DrJ]

I-am-not-making-this-up quit drinking tonight.

Don't worry, hit, I'll cover for you. Tonight. Tomorrow you are on your own.

[hit and run]

DrJ:
Tomorrow you are on your own.

Really? Tomorrow's a big day. You deserve indulging tomorrow.......

[DrJ]

I will, hit. I just won't cover for you.

Good thing we have a stock, since we will be drowning in rain. Up the hill they are supposed to get six feet of snow this weekend.

[Porchlight]

Pofarmer, I'm sure you don't need secret chili ingredient tips but...psst...chocolate syrup.

That is all.

[Melinda Romanoff]

Life could be worse, ladies and gentlemen.

I've seen this up real close, and it is very serious.

[Ignatz]

--Up the hill they are supposed to get six feet of snow this weekend.--

Yeah, I'm afraid I'm out of the logging business til next May.
Which isn't too bad cause we got the last load we had to get out today.

[Janet]

Life is a terminal condition, asshat.

Did Old Lurker have a symbol for asshat?

[Melinda Romanoff]

Porch,

Yer creepin' into molé.

[Porchlight]

Depth and richness, Melinda. You don't use a lot, maybe a tablespoon per gallon. Rounds out the acid of the tomatoes and the heat of the chilies.

[Melinda Romanoff]

I'm not going to walk into a molé discussion with a Texan. That's just askin' to look stoopid.

And my molé isn't too bad. (red variant)

[PD]

Still wondering what in God's name an identity conservative is.

You and me both.

Despite his protestations that he's clearly explained the terms multiple times.

[hit and run]

I once did a venison molé chili here on JOM,though google denies that it happened.

It was a spur-of-the-moment-why-the-heck-not-because-the-family-is-out-of-town inspiration.

And it worked really well.

I've got no dead deer in my freezer this year and that makes me sad.

[Danube of Thought]

"The party made 86 million voter contacts, we had staff or volunteers in 435 congressional districts, we raised and spent more money than ever in a midterm, we had the lergest midterm field effort ever, we ran or staffed virtually all the coordinated campaigns in all the key states."

After all that, are you prepared to draw any inferences from the outcome?

[DrJ]

I just received the company health care policy renewal costs. Up by 30%. Ouch!

[Clarice]

DoT, you wise ass.It was a SUCCESS..just like cash for clunkers, GM, the Stimulus packages, the G20, the Ghialani trial..a success damn it

Where are those strawberries?

[Clarice]

I like venison chile. I love buffalo chile.

[PD]

We just had the open enrollment for our health care, too. I was prepared from hearing other people's stories for a big jump, but surprisingly it's not a penny different. No idea why or how.

[DrJ]

I'm jealous, PD. It doesn't cost the company anything, as I pay the first x dollars per employee, and the employee is responsible for the rest (or can put it in an HSA is there is $$ left over).

It does mean that it will cost me a lot more personally next year.

I'll see if other providers offer a better deal.

[narciso]

If DHS policy makes you 'say hmm,' as Arsenio used to say, there's an app for that, in the LUN

[Melinda Romanoff]

Sorry, I've been distracted.

[PDinDetroit]

Clarice - I will be making Venison Chili sometime this weekend after a successful hunt this week (Firearm Deer Season in MI).

My secret ingredient at LUN.

Since venison has a "deeper" flavor than beef, it deserves a deeper-flavored spice. My local grocer sells Chipotle Powder in bulk and really makes the chili (does not increase the heat).

[Just a drip.]

Maple Syrup, Porch.
========